We have a Squid!

We have a squid at work named David. I secretly call him "Camp David" because he's gayer than Christmas.

He also drives me mad. He's young, queer and has the sensibilities of a 14-year-old girl. He doesn't shut up about clothes or boys. And he thinks I am his greatest friend.

"There's a train at 6.30 that takes us back to Glasgow." I say to him.

"6.30?"

"6.30."

"6.30??!!"

"Uh-huh yes 6.30."

"I can't believe it... 6.30??!!"

"YES! SIX-THIRTY ALRIGHT??!"

My co-workers were turning shades of green. There's a quiet Asian girl who works across from me who barely comes up for air during the day.

"La... tu le connais?"

"Oui.."

"Il me fait eclater celui-la."

"Ouais."

One of these days I am going to strangle him.